| Yarns from the Hashers |
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For your delight and amusement, we have plumbed the depths of our Hashers'
memories.
The dregs that are fit to print are below.
But, a word of warning: Do not believe a word of it!
They wouldn't know the truth if it bit them on the ankle!
BOYS WILL BE BOYS
The boys of H2H3 made their big bid for freedom and
self-expression by holding a Boys Only Hash on Tuesday 8th July 2008.
Realising that the exclusion of the distaff side would seriously deplete the number of Hashers it was
declared mandatory that each H2H3 member must bring two guests to swell the attendance and
introduce some diversity.
Fortuitously word of the Boys Only nature of the occasion had been noised around the parish and
Hashers of a certain bent were only too keen to attend. An acute air of disappointment was
discernible among the visitors as they assembled at the Chicken Coop in Cha Am when it became
apparent that they were more than half-a-century too late for the term "BOYS" to be in any way
apposite.
However once the jaws had stopped dropping the whole assembly set off enthusiastically to follow
chalked-up arrows and squared paper around the urban environs of Cha Am.
The built-up aspect of the environment presented different hazards from the usual Hash hardships.
The prevalence of entertainment palaces in profusion along the way, complete with charming young
visions offering unstinted commendations of the attractions of their premises were such that
eventually it became very hard saying NO to the blandishments of a whole succession of Miss
Orchids.
cont./...
The boys of H2H3 made their big bid for freedom and
self-expression by holding a Boys Only Hash on Tuesday 8th July 2008.
Realising that the exclusion of the distaff side would seriously deplete the number of Hashers it was
declared mandatory that each H2H3 member must bring two guests to swell the attendance and
introduce some diversity.
Fortuitously word of the Boys Only nature of the occasion had been noised around the parish and
Hashers of a certain bent were only too keen to attend. An acute air of disappointment was
discernible among the visitors as they assembled at the Chicken Coop in Cha Am when it became
apparent that they were more than half-a-century too late for the term "BOYS" to be in any way
apposite.
However once the jaws had stopped dropping the whole assembly set off enthusiastically to follow
chalked-up arrows and squared paper around the urban environs of Cha Am.
The built-up aspect of the environment presented different hazards from the usual Hash hardships.
The prevalence of entertainment palaces in profusion along the way, complete with charming young
visions offering unstinted commendations of the attractions of their premises were such that
eventually it became very hard saying NO to the blandishments of a whole succession of Miss
Orchids.
cont./...
.../cont.
Another hazard was the footbridge over the Phetkasem Road where Scotch Tape's visitors Ben Doon and Phil
McCavity became the first shortcutters when, because they were both kilted, neither one was prepared to precede the
other up the stairs.
Next to shortcut were Sparky's guests, Empty Arms and Dell the Yell. Ballbanger had told us these guys came from a
Greek island but he had misheard because of his intermittent deafness and the guys are actors so they had
introduced themselves as Thespians, not what Ballbanger thought.
Empty Arms has a long history of shortcutting but Dell the Yell insisted he would love to have completed the Run but
he didn't want to leave his friends behind.
So we progressed through the Cha Am market and alongside the railway tracks where Slackbladder's Chinese
cronies, Hung Hai and Donkey Clock, shortcircuited to await a train back to Bangkok. Then at the rear of the Police
Station; Terry's Scouse scallies, Nick o'Time and Bandee, were detained because of the outcry from the pursuing
market stallholders whose wares they had liberated in passing.
At the hospital we lost Rolo's game geezers, Fallen Archie and Hammer Toad who dropped out to seek the services of
a pederast, or perhaps it was a podiatrist.
Ballbanger's erstwhile shipmates, Weeping Willie and Teeny Wienie, lasted as far as the Paradise bar where they
hijacked the rest of us from the primrose path into this less than salubrious saloon "just for a quick one" which seemed
odd because they were allegedly teetotal.
Eventually we left Paradise and regained the wilderness of Cha Am beach where Long Ron's cobbers, Slender
Bender and Dinky Dai opted for the 'oggin, while the rest of us spearheaded by 69Forever and his Daunty Dalesmen,
Ewe Beauty and Foamy Nail, continued on to collapse at the Chicken Coop.
Here we rejoined the shortcutters, those out on bail, the hospital dischargees, the dripping swimmers, those who
missed the train, and the fallen angels cast out of Paradise and commandeered an immense table to accommodate all
of us while we usurped Deep Throat's birthday buffet and wolfed and wassailed uproariously until the first streaks of
dawn blemished the blackness.
Another hazard was the footbridge over the Phetkasem Road where Scotch Tape's visitors Ben Doon and Phil
McCavity became the first shortcutters when, because they were both kilted, neither one was prepared to precede the
other up the stairs.
Next to shortcut were Sparky's guests, Empty Arms and Dell the Yell. Ballbanger had told us these guys came from a
Greek island but he had misheard because of his intermittent deafness and the guys are actors so they had
introduced themselves as Thespians, not what Ballbanger thought.
Empty Arms has a long history of shortcutting but Dell the Yell insisted he would love to have completed the Run but
he didn't want to leave his friends behind.
So we progressed through the Cha Am market and alongside the railway tracks where Slackbladder's Chinese
cronies, Hung Hai and Donkey Clock, shortcircuited to await a train back to Bangkok. Then at the rear of the Police
Station; Terry's Scouse scallies, Nick o'Time and Bandee, were detained because of the outcry from the pursuing
market stallholders whose wares they had liberated in passing.
At the hospital we lost Rolo's game geezers, Fallen Archie and Hammer Toad who dropped out to seek the services of
a pederast, or perhaps it was a podiatrist.
Ballbanger's erstwhile shipmates, Weeping Willie and Teeny Wienie, lasted as far as the Paradise bar where they
hijacked the rest of us from the primrose path into this less than salubrious saloon "just for a quick one" which seemed
odd because they were allegedly teetotal.
Eventually we left Paradise and regained the wilderness of Cha Am beach where Long Ron's cobbers, Slender
Bender and Dinky Dai opted for the 'oggin, while the rest of us spearheaded by 69Forever and his Daunty Dalesmen,
Ewe Beauty and Foamy Nail, continued on to collapse at the Chicken Coop.
Here we rejoined the shortcutters, those out on bail, the hospital dischargees, the dripping swimmers, those who
missed the train, and the fallen angels cast out of Paradise and commandeered an immense table to accommodate all
of us while we usurped Deep Throat's birthday buffet and wolfed and wassailed uproariously until the first streaks of
dawn blemished the blackness.
THOSE ABSENT SHALL LOOK UPON THEMSELVES AND CURSE
THEIR FATE
AND HOLD THEIR MANHOODS CHEAP WHILST ANY SPEAKS
THAT RAN THE BOYS OWN RUN ON JULY 8
Penned by SCOTCH TAPE
THEIR FATE
AND HOLD THEIR MANHOODS CHEAP WHILST ANY SPEAKS
THAT RAN THE BOYS OWN RUN ON JULY 8
Penned by SCOTCH TAPE
HASH NAME: Old MacDonald
HOME HASH: Cha-Am/Hua Hin
COUNTRIES HASHED: England, Thailand
Chiang Mai for the Inter-Hash. Food and Drinks in large quantities were provided by Singha beer.
WORST HASH: There aren't any bad Hashes
FANTASY HASH: At 74 years old I've stopped fantasising!
FUNNIEST HASH: Ballbanger dressed to imitate Cannonballs at a Hash near Springfield Golf
Course
HOME HASH: Cha-Am/Hua Hin
COUNTRIES HASHED: England, Thailand
Chiang Mai for the Inter-Hash. Food and Drinks in large quantities were provided by Singha beer.
WORST HASH: There aren't any bad Hashes
FANTASY HASH: At 74 years old I've stopped fantasising!
FUNNIEST HASH: Ballbanger dressed to imitate Cannonballs at a Hash near Springfield Golf
Course
HASH NAME: Cathusalem
COUNTRIES HASHED: UK, Thailand, India, Australia, Malaysia, SIngapore
BEST HASH: This is like asking what is your best sh@g ever! A Bangkok H3 Hash comes to mind.
We went by bus to a mystery Point A about 2 hours from town. A lovely trail but the notable thing
was that I was the first to reach Point B. The front runners didn't follow paper when they saw the
bus near to Point B and finished up having to make quite a long detour!
WORST HASH: The worst Hashes are the ones you don't get to due to traffic, atrocious weather,
serious MisDirections (wrong grid references) or just not being in the mood for it!
FANTASY HASH: I had a fantasy and it turned into reality. I founded the Devon A2B HHH!
FUNNIEST HASH: I've got to admit I do love a particular photo of a group of Harriettes
down-downing (find last two photos on this page: TDH3 Run #58). You can read my write-up, but
don't miss the photos of these lovely girls whom I just happen to meet up with at every InterHash
since then! On! On!
COUNTRIES HASHED: UK, Thailand, India, Australia, Malaysia, SIngapore
BEST HASH: This is like asking what is your best sh@g ever! A Bangkok H3 Hash comes to mind.
We went by bus to a mystery Point A about 2 hours from town. A lovely trail but the notable thing
was that I was the first to reach Point B. The front runners didn't follow paper when they saw the
bus near to Point B and finished up having to make quite a long detour!
WORST HASH: The worst Hashes are the ones you don't get to due to traffic, atrocious weather,
serious MisDirections (wrong grid references) or just not being in the mood for it!
FANTASY HASH: I had a fantasy and it turned into reality. I founded the Devon A2B HHH!
FUNNIEST HASH: I've got to admit I do love a particular photo of a group of Harriettes
down-downing (find last two photos on this page: TDH3 Run #58). You can read my write-up, but
don't miss the photos of these lovely girls whom I just happen to meet up with at every InterHash
since then! On! On!
